Khaberni - The gap between exposure to harm and self-protection is bridged by experience. When an individual is repeatedly exposed to harm or disappointment, they develop mechanisms to protect themselves.
A new study has shown that adopting self-protection measures is akin to choosing one's own path, but with emotionally safe steps.
It also pointed out that self-protection actually means learning from disappointments and making smart choices that avoid disappointment, according to what was published by Global English Editing.
It indicated that there are 8 ways individuals learn to protect themselves from repeated disappointments, as follows:
1. Building Emotional Walls
Experience is a harsh teacher that shapes people's reactions over time.
Dealing with repeated disappointments can also be psychologically taxing.
To cope, some individuals resort to building emotional walls. The idea of this defense mechanism is to construct a psychological fortress that repels negative feelings and harsh experiences.
This serves as a preventative measure to filter out harmful situations or people.
Through this preventative action, people find a way to immunize themselves against painful disappointments. More importantly, it is a conscious choice and a learned behavior that evolves over years of valuable experience.
2. Trust with Awareness
It should be ensured that there is a healthy balance and not everything and everyone is shut out. Learning to differentiate between trust and betrayal makes a fundamental difference in the complex emotional game of life.
3. Embracing Resilience
Resilience is not acquired overnight, but is forged in the crucible of adversity and disappointment. It is a trait that enables individuals to rise after setbacks, overcome pain, and move forward.
4. Avoiding Toxic Relationships
Avoiding toxic relationships is another effective method individuals use to protect themselves from repeated disappointments.
A relationship, whether emotional or friendly, becomes toxic when it drains more energy from a person than it nourishes.
When one suffers from an emotional deficit, disappointments hit harder.
People who have experienced complex relationship dynamics learn to recognize the signs early. They become adept at identifying warning indicators such as psychological manipulation, emotional abuse, or continual negativity.
Once the toxicity of the relationship is understood and acknowledged, the next step is to disconnect and distance oneself. It's not about harboring grudges or seeking revenge; it's about self-preservation.
5. Learning Self-Love
One of the main aspects often neglected when faced with repeated disappointments is self-love, which is not always easy, especially when stuck in a vortex of frustration.
Negative experiences can fuel self-doubt, leading one to criticize oneself harshly.
However, it’s important to recognize that self-love acts as a shield or protective layer that makes disappointments less personal and more related to the surrounding circumstances.
It also serves as a beacon of light that keeps self-esteem firm even when external validation fades.
6. Setting Clear Boundaries
Setting boundaries helps maintain mental well-being.
Setting boundaries also means recognizing one's emotional readiness and expressing it clearly.
This aids in distinguishing between healthy and destructive relationships.
Clear boundaries ensure that one does not overextend oneself and invite unnecessary disappointments.
7. Pursuing Personal Growth
Personal growth is often a path carved through wounds and scars, where disappointment can be a catalyst for personal development.
It also motivates one to break out of the cycle of repeated disappointments, leading to self-reflection, enhancement of emotional intelligence, and maturity.
It enables individuals to avoid situations that led to disappointments in the past, with people who have experienced repeated and painful disappointments investing their energy in self-improvement. They read more books, attend workshops, and strive earnestly to better themselves.
8. Embracing Self-Compassion
The essence of protecting oneself from years of disappointment lies in embracing self-compassion, which is not limited to merely treating oneself kindly in moments of difficulty or failure, but extends to recognizing that everyone makes mistakes and experiences pain.
When a person shows compassion towards themselves, they acknowledge that disappointments and failures are intrinsic parts of the human experience and are not indicators of personal flaws.
It is noted that through practicing self-compassion, a person learns to treat themselves with the same kindness and understanding that they would offer to others in times of distress.
