Khaberni - Life is filled with various types of people, some are friendly while others test the patience of those around them and those who deal with them. Dealing with difficult people is energy-draining whether it's a domineering coworker or a highly critical relative. What matters most is how to handle these people without losing calm and peace of mind. According to the Times of India, there are psychologically based tips that help one stay calm and not get dragged into problems that threaten their mental peace, as follows:
1. Choose to speak to trustworthy individuals
Venting out to the wrong person increases anger, while speaking with the right people makes one feel heard and understood, and helps them recover. One should confide about personal problems with trustworthy friends who understand emotions, rather than critics who amplify a person’s anger.
2. Mental preparation
Many follow predictable patterns, including difficult individuals. Thus, observing their patterns helps in mental preparation. This step aids in reprogramming the amygdala (fear center) in the brain, making the person less reactionary.
3. Do not engage with chaos
One must understand that difficult people have no authority over someone unless they interact with their chaos. When one is loud or aggressive towards someone, maintaining calm becomes their superpower because it regains control over the situation.
4. Listen without interruption
Avoiding arguments with difficult people and letting them vent helps calm their anger, shows respect, and uncovers their real issues. It also helps find solutions that they may overlook.
5. Respond without emotion
One should not immediately respond to a provocative comment. Instead, take a deep breath and pause for a moment. Reacting is automatic, whereas responding is thoughtful wisdom. Silence is not weakness but a strategy. When someone yells, a calm tone can help regain control and calm the situation through psychological "emotional contagion", where others unconsciously mirror one’s calmness. So, when provoked, one should breathe deeply, count to ten, and possibly ask clarifying questions like: "What do you mean?"
6. Focus on what is important and relevant
When speaking with difficult people, focus on facts and current issues. Old arguments should be avoided as they lead to more conflicts without any solutions to the problem.
7. Clearly define boundaries
When dealing with disrespect or difficult behaviors, it is important to clearly and calmly set boundaries. Difficult people test boundaries, but setting clear boundaries teaches them how to respect and treat the person properly.
8. Their emotions are their own
Stop trying to change others' moods. If someone is angry or frustrated and acts tough, that’s their problem. Instead, maintain calm and focus on one's reaction, rather than their emotions.
9. Change the course of the conversation
If the conversation with these difficult people turns into toxic dialogue, change the topic. Sometimes, diverting attention can help maintain calm in interactions.
10. Withdraw from the situation
If changing the course of the conversation isn't possible, withdrawing is a better option when one starts to feel overwhelmed. It signifies self-respect and avoids stooping to their petty level.
