Khaberni - Egyptian artist Hamza Namira talks about a poignant human experience he had in his childhood when he lost his mother at a young age, revealing that this event left a deep mark on his personality and contributed to shaping his artistic and human path.
Hamza Namira said, during a TV interview, that sadness is part of his nature, but it does not mean that he lives in a state of depression, explaining: "Perhaps sadness is part of my nature, but it does not mean that I spread sadness around me, rather it is a kind of contemplation of life, and my mother's death in my childhood affected me and gave me a sense of melancholy from an early age."
Primary School
Hamza Namira noted that his mother died when he was in primary school, due to serious complications during pregnancy, which put her in a coma that lasted for about a full year, saying: "I was in the fourth or fifth grade of primary school, and I remember well that my mother's heart stopped then started working again, but brain cells were damaged, so she remained in a coma for a year."
He continued: "That was a major event for me, especially since we were living in a foreign Arab country away from our relatives, so we were completely alone, and that experience left a profound effect on me and my siblings."
Hamza Namira explained that he felt a strange fear when he learned of his mother's pregnancy, saying: "For some reason I don't know, I felt an internal terror when I learned that my mother was pregnant, and it crossed my mind that she might die because of this pregnancy, and I was terrified of that idea."
He added that after the birth and the complications, he waited for her and the child to come home, but the next morning his father, who was a doctor, sat with him calmly and informed him that her heart had stopped, and that brain cells do not regenerate except by a miracle from God, and asked him to pray for that miracle to happen.
Permanent Fear
He continued saying: "I spent a whole year praying to God every day that the miracle would happen, but it didn’t, and it was this experience that caused my constant feeling of anxiety and fear of negative thoughts, because they might actually come true." He explained that he later realized through therapy sessions that this continuous anxiety was a direct result of the trauma of losing his mother in his childhood.
The artist confirmed that the experience left a deep impact on his family of three siblings, saying: "That event affected us all, especially since we were living abroad without relatives or family support, so the experience was shocking and harsh."
And Namira recalled his memories of that period, explaining that his late father was a cheerful and life-loving person, and said: "After my mother's death, our father gave us double the affection, and tried his best to ease our pain and help us overcome that difficult stage."
Therapy Sessions
The artist mentioned that his sessions with the psychiatrist made him realize that that painful experience was an indirect reason for his turn to art, saying: "The doctor told me that perhaps if that incident had not happened, I might not have become an artist, because by nature I am a reticent person who does not know how to express myself with words, but after what happened, I was filled with many emotions that I could not express, so music and singing became my only way to release them. And perhaps that was the fuel that made me strive to be an artist."
Namira concluded his talk saying: "These are the decrees of God Almighty, for often we think that what befalls us is evil, but in reality, it may be all good."
